Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The girls

I realized later that in my last post, I didn't come back to the subject of what the girls know, understand, have been told, etc. about my situation. It came up in the car on Saturday, and was a fairly natural conversation. Still I have not read the book about talking to the kids, but I think we did okay. I ended up explaining that I have two new "spots" according to my last scans. Since there are two, the doctors don't want to do surgery, so they want to give me very strong medicine instead to try to make the spots smaller, or go away. The girls understood this pretty well. Then I explained that I might have to go to Columbus for a week or two in the hospital to get a particular strong medicine that I can't take at home. Carly didn't get it, which is understandable, and okay. Rebecca was upset about my leaving her and the family for a week. "But I don't WANT you to go to Columbus, mom!" "Well sweetie, if my doctors decide this is the best thing for me, I have to do it, but you can talk to me on the phone every day." "Can I visit you?" "Probably, we'll figure that out later." More like probably not, but we'll cross that bridge later.

This morning we were discussing my spots as we got ready for school and work. The subject came up because I had my final appointment at the wound healing center - I am healed! I still need to wear the special bandage if I will be sitting a lot (like at work) or sweating, etc. but don't have to wear it at night anymore. This is to keep the skin from macerating until it heals more completely. The hole is closed but the doctor said that the skin is not at 100% yet. But it will be... At any rate, somehow we decided to name Mommy's spots. The ovary spot is of course a girl, and the liver spot a boy. Rebecca decided the ovary spot's name should be Sabrina. Carly said the other spot should be Joey, which I vetoed. If one of the girls had been a boy, he would have been named Joseph Thomas after Jim's grandpa and our dads. So Joey is a special name to me.

When I picked the girls up this afternoon, Carly had a cute little caterpillar figure in a little nest, that they had put together today. She told us that the caterpillar's name is, you guessed it, Joey! That was okay in my book. I ran into one of her teachers in the parking lot. The teacher told me that Carly had a name for her caterpillar right away, while the other kids had to think about it. I didn't go into the back story with her, but I got a good chuckle out of it.

Our other good news tonight was that our new patio furniture was delivered today. So we got to eat supper outside for the first time this summer! I am happy with the set, and made sure to use the fancy cover we had bought for it to make sure it stays nice. The only problem was the bugs. Now, if you were my new PartyLite candle holders, with citronella candles purchased to accompany, where would YOU be? Actually as I am writing this I think I remember exactly where they are, so we can use them next time. Now I just need to get our power washer unearthed from the garage and set up so I can clean the deck; it looks worse than ever with something new on it. I had hoped to get this done before delivery day, but it wasn't to be.


Joannah said...

I can't imagine how challenging it must be to have a family and manage this disease, too. And yet, I'll bet your girls give you intense motivation to get through all you have to in order to be well. We've been trying to have children for two years and in a way I'm relieved that I'm not caring for a baby and Michael, too. We still hope that a family is in our future. Just waiting on doing our next step(s) until things calm down a bit.

I will be praying for you and your sweet family as you begin your next treatment. It sounds like you and my husband may be doing IL-2 about the same time.

onesillymama said...

Thanks, Joannah. You are right, the girls are my biggest motivators. Not that I wouldn't be interested in saving my life for myself, my husband, family and friends in general... but I don't intend for my sweet babies to grow up without their mommy.

I'm hopeful that your fertility challenges have been for this reason... that you needed to get Michael through his treatment first. So he and I may be IL-2 buddies, eh? Prayers lifted and fingers crossed that it works well for both of us.